Monday, February 4, 2008

Lady in Red

Hi. So sorry I haven't been in touch. As a matter of fact, I've been out of touch, with more than just you. My horoscope warned me of drama this week, and foolishly, I felt it a premature forecast and wholly unparalleled to my current existence. Nevertheless, I was wrong, sorely, painfully mistaken. I don't intend to throw myself a pity party here, but I'm pretty sure that my heart started to break and suffer great pain this evening. It was the conversation that began with innocent questions, and ended with the suggestion that this should be discussed in person. And "in person" shouldn't hurt or be odd or strange or unwelcome, because "in person" means life and love and scents and senses . . . but somehow, right now, the idea is not welcome. He, this gem of a man I've had the luxury of spending days and hours and wee hours and categorically significantly insignificant moments with, has been thinking. And thinking, truth be told, is not what it's cracked up to be. If I think too much, I can imagine great horror, great success, sweet baby faces, off-white wedding gowns and funeral services. Thinking, can be one person's demise via projections and false notions of the future. But, hey, thinking about days ahead can also translate into finishings: goals accomplished, phrases uttered and time well spent - so call me crazy for thinking that I might have found my match. Big sigh.

It's not sadness, this emotion, or emoting, instead it's a check-in. My horoscope was simply reminding me to be true to the one thing I know to be right and wrong and unjust and fair - me. I wish I didn't previously recycle the words, in the hope they were incorrect, or I'd have posted them here. Nevertheless, I'll say this . . . I am, as you may be, like the dress featured above. We are tattered, we are aged, we have seen trials and tribulations and tights, and yet we will still become someone's bookmarked page on someone's wish list, ready to be given new life and readily available to help someone stand out in a crowded room . . . ready to independently shine on our own, in living color, vibrant and beautiful and stained but never damaged goods.

xoxoxox

Sorry, photo is coming soon. It's file was too big . . . soon, however, you'll be able to see, and even purchase her on my etsy shop . . . think vintage, classy, red frock - like us all . . .